People are talking about Penn State. There’s outrage for the youngsters involved, as well as misplaced anger for a beloved coach’s firing.
What the horrible news reinforces for me? Even the most ethical people make bad decisions. I wasn’t raised Catholic, but I’ve learned about the “sin of omission.” Too many people choose the easy road around wrong-doing. We don’t want to make a fuss. We don’t want to make a scene; we avoid conflict at all costs. We look the other way and hope the nastiness goes away. We deny that there is any trouble. We ignore the important step of follow-through. I’ve done each of these at one time or another myself.
But, as an advocate for people with disabilities, as a disabled woman, I’ve learned the hard way that making noise is okay. Sometimes, people may even dislike me or what I have to say. But, I have to say it.
So, I’ll say it now: Watching as a 10-year-old boy is being raped by a man in authority, and walking away, allowing it to continue, is wrong. If you had the ability to stop it, report it immediately; choose something else, you made a mistake.
Yes, we can sit back and judge and say how awful it was and why was it allowed to continue. But, how many tough situations do you walk or drive past everyday, thinking “It’s not my problem”? Or, “they brought it on themselves, let them deal with it”?
Speaking up for those who can’t speak for themselves isn’t fun. It can be uncomfortable, messy work. Some people (even those you’re speaking for) may not like you or even, God forbid, “unfriend” you on Facebook. But, our community needs more voices who speak up and care about “the least of us” in our midst. We need more people who do the right thing and who don’t look away. Who take the time needed to clean up the messes in our community.
Our children, our elders, our people with disabilities, our felons, our environment … they all require advocates. They all need our voices. They all need us to do something and not just look away.
I have written elsewhere about my hypothesis that there is a “conspiracy of silence” in virtually every community – whether business, education, religious institution, or home – about money, anger, and/or sex. Our inability to pierce the culture norms and even social taboos that keep us from speaking up or speaking out eventually compromises or destroys integrity, personal and collective.
I further believe that if we can engage one another in a respectful conversation about any one of these topics that it almost inevitably leads to personal transformation or a shift in community relationships. But it’s not easy to do.