Ever since the string of profanity ran through my head due to my neighbors ranting about women lawyers “not having what it takes” to become full partners in law firms over dinner a couple weeks ago, (Yes, I was polite and only made one joke about the problem being that these so called “lazy women” could really use wives.) I have been haunted by the continued perception that some people do not contribute fully to the work force. And by some people I mean women. Is it that women and children are linked in ways that men and children are not? Is it because my dinner companion was of a certain age that he is still allowed to have such a low opinion of women in the workforce? Does he just not know that women are an equal part of the American workforce?

Maria Shriver was speaking to me from television talk shows and radio broadcasts as she stumps for her latest project with the Center for American Progress and the University of Southern California’s Annenberg Center on Communication Leadership and Policy. The project, A Woman’s Nation, will explore American women’s increasing roles in the workforce now that women make up half of all workers. (For more information on this project: www.americanprogress.org/issues/2009/04/womans_nation.html)

Carol Greider, winner of the 2009 Nobel Prize in Medicine quipped “I bet he wasn’t folding laundry” when asked what she thought President Obama was doing when he got the call announcing his Nobel Prize. The image that accompanied this article from the Washington Post was of a woman, riding a unicycle carrying a baby and a briefcase. I have seen versions of this image for years accompanying messaging for working women. As a child free adult I always find this message annoying and usually wonder if it actually works for women who have kids.

Perhaps my least favorite media bombardment is from my health club magazine. Children under 18 are not allowed at my gym. It is one of the reasons I pay a ridiculous monthly fee, O.K. it might be the only reason. I can barely tolerate other adults at the gym, I am certain snotty teens and squirrely middle-schoolers would add an additional level of hell to free weights.  Yet, there in between tips on eating right and what to buy for a smart workout look are pages and pages, month after month on what to feed children, how to work out with your kids, kids products in the advertisements, entire issues devoted to children’s issues.

All of this messaging effects how we as a culture see women, men and children. I have yet to see an article for dads taking their kids to the gym, or a dad juggling baby and briefcase so I assume the messages also imply that dads have no business spending valuable time “work time” with children. I have found this messaging mirrored in work environments.

In many of the environments I have worked, I have usually been punished for my child free status. I routinely watched co-workers take “un-official” time away from work, stretch flex time, use extra sick leave if a child is sick, leave early for teacher conferences, school plays, games and recitals in a frequency and in accumulated amounts that would lead to firing of a child free co-worker. I have also worked, and hopefully lead, in workplaces where what matters is counted by measures that actually affect the bottom line. No one watches for time spent staring at the computer screen, or what time you arrive and leave the office. In this preferred environment, workers who meet deadlines and achieve goals are rewarded with flexible schedules that lead to more balanced lives.

Not all workplaces can allow flexible schedules, but all leaders have it in their power to make the best environment possible for all employees.